deep{er} #31: reflections

Hello, friends:)

I can't believe it's Saturday already! I hope that your week was full of rest, relaxation, and reflections as you dug into the Word of God! 

UPDATE: So this last week was super busy again for Trav and I. I thought after our launch service I would have more time on my hands... but that was NOT the case- LOL! 

1. Discipleship- we finished week 5 of Beautiful Encounters--- LOVE! Each week this study is pressing in/on issues that are so important for Christian women! Week 5 is about 2 encounters with Jesus' power (healing power)--- and the funny thing is that I knew both of these stories in Luke 8:40-56 but had NO CLUE that they were intertwined! Quick Reflection--- this chapter makes me think about how much faith I have. I know it only takes the smallest of faith to move a mountain [Matt. 17:20], but I wonder if I even have that small amount--- sometimes I ask God for help or say the promises from the Bible, but do I really believe God will do what He promises or help when I ask? I need His divine touch to reach beyond my brokenness and heal me from the inside out.
2. Launch Sunday- we made it! Our launch was a success- we had lots of visitors and a great time at the party! My FAVORITE FAVORITE FAVORITE part of Launch was that my friend "Betty" came! Background story- I met her during a night of Evangelism. She came to the door with her phone in her hand but quickly told the person on the other end that she would call them back. I introduced our group and invited her to church. She mentioned that she was just talking to a family member (that person on the phone) about finding a church. She also told us that her husband had just passed away. We prayed right there for her and encouraged her to attend our Sunday services. I didn't see her the next week, so I baked some cookies and went to check in on her. She was thankful and said that she just needed time to get the courage to attend church alone. I understood and let her know that we would continue to pray for her. Fast forward about a month which was Launch Sunday.... I wasn't having the greatest of days, but I walked around the corner of our sanctuary and THERE SHE WAS!!!! I was so excited! I was beyond thrilled! Praise the Lord for the courage He gave her!!!! And praise the Lord for bringing us to her house just when she needed encouragement! And praise the Lord for hearing our prayers and answering them!!! Seeing "Betty" really made my day--- turned my frown upside down:) 
   
   
   
   
   
   
3. Virtual Smooches video- Trav and I LITERALLY put off my VS anniversary video for weeks because of the pressure to be funny and not knowing what to say. Well, on Wednesday we finally sat down and did a dry run....and kept the entire video! I only had to edit a few things (like when I had hair in my mouth or when I was laughing for 5 minutes and couldn't talk! LOL!). It went really well--- praise the Lord! Now all I need is for people to stop by and enter my giveaways;) I just love to bless my followers and friends- so if you haven't checked out our video yet.... stop by HERE! Watch our video and then enter to win! ****NOTE: if you don't like crafts or whatever... you can STILL watch our video! Hopefully you will laugh and get an idea of what it's like to be in "Savannahland" and what it's like to hang with us (even Olsen)! 
   

REFLECTION: So this week's reflection is really quick... honestly, I don't even want to share my reflection because it shines light on the hard time I had this past week (and possibly the week before). 

I've been really struggling the last few weeks with being a leader. I'm not sure I've been called to lead. I know I'm called to sing, but be the "leader".... not so sure. I need to work on so many things first---- I need to work on my selfishness and put that aside; I need to work on my compassion for others and being thankful for anyone who wants to serve with me (no matter what--- even if they don't do what I've asked correctly or if they have a bad attitude); I need to work on breaking my chains and being set free; I need to learn to turn off the devil's lies and only believe the truth; I need to work on how to be a great leader- one that lifts the team up, bears fruit, and glorifies God... not one that brings the team down or that causes division. 

There's A LOT more that I need to work on, but I didn't want to bore you with my sin and problems. 

Anyway... some things have been happening that have made me question my leadership position and qualities. I felt like I was a kid again--- trying to get family/someone to love me yet only getting pushed aside or forgotten, basically worthless/unloved. I also felt like I was in our former church/situation--- my voice wasn't heard and it was as if no one cared about my story/my past/me. ***NOTE: I wish I could give you more details, but it's just not necessary. Maybe someday I will give my testimony....someday.

Listening to these feelings for 2 weeks had me in a very selfish state of mind. And then God took me to John 3 during my 3030 Challenge. 

John the Baptist wasn't out for the spotlight. He pointed people to Jesus- even when his followers were arguing and jealous that Jesus was getting more followers/etc. John didn't care. He pointed them to Jesus. John even humbled himself to say, "He must become greater; I must become less." [John 3:30]. 

I try very hard to only point people to Jesus and to humble myself when I'm leading, serving, or whatever! I know it's not about me! I know I shouldn't put an emphasis on my achievements but on God's Kingdom--- honestly, I can't do anything without God so what's the point of taking the credit for accomplishments if I don't give praise back to Him!?! 

I think that the past 2 weeks has been hard because I don't like the feelings these situations brought up in my life. I thought I had been set free from the chains of abuse. I thought that I knew in my heart how loved I am and my worth is in Jesus. 

But I listened to the lies from Satan. I forgot it all and was sent down the tunnel of hurt and pain again. 

Now I'm working on humbling myself so that I can lead on Sunday. I know that God has called Trav and I to NHE ... and I'm almost POSITIVE that God wants Trav to lead (because it's out of his comfort zone)! I'm not sure on my position of leading, but I know I am with Trav. I will lead with him. We are a team. 

I just pray that I don't get in the way... that I always point people to Jesus. 

***NOTE: I guess my reflection was a bit longer. And it is a bunch of stuff that might not make sense, but one day when I give my testimony... hopefully it will all be clear! LOL! 

My goals for this week:

1. Continue my 3030 Challenge --- I'm in the book of John and super excited about what God's going to reveal to me! Open my eyes and show me great and marvelous things in your Word!!! Psalm 119:18
2. We DID it!!!!!!! We completed chapter 5 of the Dr. David Jeremiah Agents of Apocalypse--- now we just need to do the sermon and study guide! NOTE: Trav said last night when we completed chapter 5 that that was his favorite chapter! LOL! 
3. Continue to pray for my NEW Women's Bible Study- Stuck! Will you join me in praying?! THANKS! It starts April 21st.  

I pray that God has been speaking to you--- and that you are blessed beyond what you have asked or wanted ❤️. I also am praying that God would open our eyes and heart to His Will, love, and Word. May you go deep{er} with God this week! 

Remember, if you need prayer, please contact me {savannahland2 at comcast dot net}. 

THANKS so much for stopping by today! Be blessed:}