29 November 2014

deep{er} #16: reflections

Hello, friends:)

I'm so thankful that you've stopped by to reflect with me! 

OH! That reminds me--- I hope you had a FABULOUS Thanksgiving full of love, time with family/friends, and blessings! 

UPDATE: THANK YOU x100000 for your prayers for my ankle. I don't have any new news.... well, I did kind of have a "gravity attack" on Friday night. I fell off my knee scooter (don't ask me how) and hurt my left knee, my left elbow, both wrists, and back. OUCH! Other than that, I'm doing good:) 

Last week I shared a confession and reflection. I received lots of feedback, most of it positive. Let me comment quickly: 
  • I read each comment, and I take each to heart. I appreciate you taking the time to leave some love and comment! THANK YOU! I'm blown away by all the love I received last week (and previous weeks)---- I thank the Lord for you [Philippians 1:3]!! 
  • I share "reflections" and "confessions" because I want to go deep{er} with God. These topics and reflections are deep for me--- I share some personal stuff. I'm not sharing because I'm pointing out something in someone else or trying to condemn you. I share because I want to allow God to reveal in my heart how I need to deal with sin/a situation/move on/etc. 
  • These posts are not pointed directly at anyone. I am not hoping someone specific will read it and then respond. I'm not doing these reflections (esp. last week's post) because I want a response. I write and share because it's on my heart that I have bitter roots inside. I know that these roots have grown because of lack of care/love from friends and even from those who told us we were "part of the family". The last year has been one of the hardest times of my life- who wants to go through that alone? And so I am crying out to God... not so that someone will respond. *When I say respond, I mean send me a message and say they "miss me"/etc. While that is great to hear, I don't write so that is the response.
  • Unfortunately, Trav and I have been hurt. It really sucks that we gave and served until our hearts bled and cried. This pain is very recent-- it hasn't been a year yet, but close. And it really sucks that we didn't get a call or email from 99% of those we cared about... but not all is lost! I'm not sure I was clear in my last post, but we have learned some lessons: 
    • We know who our true friends are and how to evaluate friendships, as well as what to look for in friends.
    • We know we can't rely on people... we need to rely MORE on God. 
So... hopefully this makes more sense! I pray that God will use my posts and reflections to help us all grow deep{er}.  

REFLECTION: Ok.... so this week I started reading The Circle Maker by Mark Batterson (THANKS, Tina, for letting me borrow your book! I'm almost done!). OH MY! What a good book! I have been wanting to do a prayer study... and this is really getting into prayer, circling those prayers and promises in the Bible, and dreaming big.

Two things stuck out during my reading this week: 

  1. Matthew 17:24-27 is the story about Jesus telling Peter that when he goes out to fish he will find money in the fish's mouth to pay for the taxes. Batterson brought up a great point about why Jesus would tell Peter to go find money in a fish's mouth. Peter knew how to fish- he'd been doing it all his life. So Jesus probably told Peter to "go fish" to see if Peter trusted him in the "realm where Peter had the greatest professional proficiency and self sufficiency (fishing)" pg 120,121
    • Question: Where do I think I need God the least? Where do I think I know it all? Maybe that is where God wants me to trust Him so He can do something beyond my ability! 
    • It makes me wonder... Do I think I know it all when it comes to worship? Or is this God doing something beyond my ability... taking me out of a place to put me somewhere where He is going to knock my socks off?
    • Either way, I need to obey God and His promptings because I don't want to miss out on Him blessing me beyond my ability.
  2. Prayer Postures- I've never really been "on my knees" in prayer. Growing up, Dad would stand at the bottom of the stairs to pray with us as we lay in bed. Trav and I pray before meals (sitting at the table) and sometimes standing in a room or on stage. Batterson says that kneeling isn't magical, but it's biblical. SO TRUE! 
    • So I ask myself, Why won't you humble yourself and get on your knees? The answer (at this moment in my life) is because I can't get up with this boot! LOL!
    • Reading about 'Prayer Postures' in the book makes me want to get really serious about how I want to take my prayers to the next level. It's not that God will hear me better or answer my prayers quicker if I'm on my knees. I just want to honor God with my prayers. I also want to get deep{er} with my prayers. ***I've been saying that in my goals for weeks! I think that if I get on my knees that will take me deep{er}! 
I cannot wait to read the last couple chapters in this book! I already have an idea of a scrapbook page I want to do that will share which prayers and promises in the Bible I will be circling. Which makes me think of one more reflection- my prayers are selfish in nature. I usually ask for help and healing for family, friends, Trav/I... and that's ok, but I want to go deep{er}. I don't want to stop praying until it is answered--- even if that is 10 years from now! I want to pray through so I can see God come through! I don't want to pray and pray and then give up... I will circle my prayers and requests like Joshua did around Jericho [Joshua 6]. I give up too soon... I'm going to pray circles around my dreams, prayer requests, and promises in the Bible! I cannot wait to show you this scrapbook page;) *** I bet it will take me at least 2 months to start on it! LOL! I will def. show you once I finish it:) 

My goals for this week:
  1. Pray hardest even when it's hardest to pray and get on my knees and pray!  
  2. Continue with chapter 2 of the Dr. David Jeremiah Agents of Apocalypse--- Trav and I started this study last week:) LOVE it! 
  3. Continue to pray/read my devotions daily  
      I pray that God has been speaking to you--- and that you are blessed beyond what you have asked or wanted ❤️. Remember, if you need prayer, please contact me {savannahland2 at comcast dot net}. 

      THANKS so much for stopping by today! Be blessed:}

      ps... I'm going to ask for MORE prayers!!! Please pray for Trav and I as we are leading worship today and tomorrow at New Hope Community Church. We are also leading worship next weekend at New Hope East on the 7th! Please pray for good health, that our hearts would be in the right place for worship, and that the congregation would only see Jesus! We need His covering! THANK YOU


      Samantha Mann said...

      I am amazed, inspired and humbled each week by your openness and reflections. Thank you for sharing with us. I will pray for you and also for you and trav as a team during your leading worship. Thank you for everything! <3

      Julie Tucker-Wolek said...

      So sorry you fell and hurt yourself again :(

      Lisa said...

      So happy you had a great Thanksgiving...so sad you had a "gravity" attack!! Thinking of you sweet friend ;)

      Heather said...

      I LOVE YOU SO MUCH!!! Get better soon!

      Ryoma Sakamoto.Japan said...

      Japanese also I will cherish the feeling of "gratitude".

      Nancy Carroll said...

      Hi, sorry to hear you hurt yourself with the trike, never used one, always used crutches, but can image falling from that...ouch. hope you hear more soon about how to proceed, but sometimes it just takes time. I knew something was wrong after my knee replacement, but they want to rule out everything before another surgery, so it was four months out when the non-invasive things didn't work and the next surgery took place, but it's very frustrating waiting.

      As for people letting you down, I learned that lesson early, namely my own family, but since then I have many acquaintances and few friends, but they are ones i can count on and they can also count on me... prayers go out to you.

      Miriam Prantner said...

      Hope that the worship service went well! I'm so impressed that you are doing that even with a bum ankle! What a great example you are! Praying that you guys continue to heal, and so glad that you have Trav!